Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Can You Handle That by Mike Reid



In a world 
where almost every woman,
feels like she has to be just a little bit prettier, 
a little bit skinner, 
a little bit stronger, 
a little more perfect,
a little less real.
She needs a man.
A man with arms like water.
Soft enough to wash away her insecurities.
But strong enough to carry her burdens.
With hands like German shepherds.
Big enough to bury her face in when she can't keep it together.
But loyal enough to never turn against her.
His lips are like cotton.
Soft enough to kiss her most fragile of body parts.
But strong enough to speak confidence into her soul. 
It is with this man,
That she will be her unapologetic self.
Where 3 extra pounds are just an opportunity to love you 3 times as much,
Where 3 bumps on your face are only proof that God still is still working on his masterpiece he calls you beauty. 
Where stretch marks are tiger stripes to scare away any man that can't handle a woman who's still growing.
Where her tears aren't reason for you to run. 
But a confirmation that she feels comfortable enough around you to let her guard down.....
Can you handle that? - Mike Reid

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Choosing How To Live Your Life

Late nights out on the town is a major part of being single but there are also many lonely nights just sitting at home with nothing to do is equally a part of the single life. When you are single, you expect to have both nights in your life at some point through the week because there is nothing left to do once you get done working for the day. Working is the only thing that is stable in a single-person’s life, but they do not see it that way instead they tend to take working for granted and enjoy the rest of the days.
Just like it is considered normal to go to work everyday a single person sees their life as normal whether sitting around or partying after work. Life is what you make of it and whether you are single or married as long as you are happy with what you are doing everyday, and it is not harming anyone, including yourself then everyone should be happy. Some single people enjoy partying to all hours of the night and giving themselves just enough tie to get home and get ready for work where others just like sitting at home reading a good book. However, you make your life it will eventually change so you should enjoy your single moments while you have them.

Black in America, We Can Do Better



“To be a poor man is hard, but to be a poor race in a land of dollars is the very bottom of hardship”. 

To blame without a solution is worthless so with the Black Community we have to hold ourselves accountable for the conditions we are in today. I know the system hinders our development as a race but we’re still presented with an opportunity to do better so we must rise above the obstacles in front of us. The number one problem with the community today is the lack of a family structure that we once had in the past. Most of our people in poverty today lack the two parent household that most of our Whites and Hispanics counterparts have. The structure in the house is vital to the development of the children and balances the household. It takes a village to raise a child so we need structure and to put our kids around great people to give them the energy to succeed. When one person is stuck playing superwomen or superman the load will most likely get too large to bear on our own. It’s not humanly possible to play all those roles and be efficient in all of them. 


I praise our sisters who are doing it on their own but just remember everyone needs a shoulder to lean on so always keep a good team around your kids. The biggest problem that’s leading our community to one parent household besides the usual break up is our black men going to prison at a record rate. Blacks only make up about 14% of the population as a whole and we make up over 50% of the prison population. Now this is a tricky situation, why are black males more submissive to committing crimes? I think that’s where the system plays a huge part and the lack of structure in our black households. The system portrays us as no good criminals by just simply looking at our music and the record selling movies geared to African Americans. 


We need to be careful what our kids are listening to and or watching due to that fact. Hip hop is not going to change their lyrics because there is no money and or enough freedom in their art to be more socially conscious. So we need to be more conscious of what their listening to and not allowing our children to play the part the systems gears for black folks. For example while overseas I ran into an Italian male and he told me the girls love black men in Italy. I asked why is that the case and he said because all the girls think you guys are like 50 Cent (they watch too much MTV). Just look at the music videos folks and black women wonder why they’re losing respect. Look at how the videos portray women like their tools and just eye candy shaking their bodies everywhere. We can’t allow our women to continually get disgraced like that and it creates the ego in the male to use women in that role. At the end of the day I think people lost the sense of what our ancestors struggled with in the past to get us a better future. Their struggles should not be taken for granted. Since Civil Rights was passed in 1964 we as a race have not been united to bring about a change in ourselves. Economically we’re still dead last in this country as well as education.  


“A racial wealth gap affects all of us because it means that a large portion of the population cannot contribute to building the wealth and strength of our nation, and that is a drain on us all," said Meizhu Lui, director of the Insight Center for Community Economic Development's "Closing the Racial Wealth Gap Initiative.


 I think most African Americans forgot what the Civil Rights fight was all about. The struggle was not just about interrogation but also voting, jobs, education, justice, and housing. In all phases Blacks are clearly last compared to their counterparts Hispanics and Whites. If we want real change we have to continually study our past history and understand the system.-Leonel Joseph 

What I Found Out About Relationships!

This realization can happen if your woman is in total acceptance of the ‘real you’ and respects you for it. If your woman does not respect you for what you really are as a person, then she is doubting your capability or decision-making power. A healthy relationship is characterized by respect. The following instances may help you realize if your woman really respects you or not. 

Respect is all about listening to each other, valuing their opinion and listening in an unbiased or non-judgmental manner. If your woman is the kind who does most of the talking without waiting to hear your opinion or views, it shows that she doesn’t care for or regard your opinion in taking a decision. 

If your woman is unsure or there is always a lingering sense of bias in her whenever you take a decision or voice your opinion, it's her way of communicating that she has little regard for your thoughts or emotions. 

If your woman does not respect you, then there is no scope for sharing or trusting each other. Supporting each other’s goals in life and respecting your feelings and views is necessary. Demeaning or speaking in a derogatory manner about your activities or interests, is a warning that your woman has no respect for you. Being cordial with your friends and respecting you for choosing the right kind of people to socialize with, forms a part of valuing and respecting you as an individual. 

Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Are Black Women Too Materialistic?


I was reading this Khalil Gibran short story about a woman that left her rich husband to shack up with a poor man and I was like, “that wouldnever be a Black woman!”
And don’t get me wrong, ladies, it’s not like I think you’re all materialistic; let’s get that straight from the door.
Like most men of my generation and the ones that follow it, as a Black man, I’m surrounded on all sides by Black women. I get it coming and going. And trust me, sometimes I am sympathetic to the brothers that say, “You know what? To hell with this!” get them a white woman of any available quality and head off to the hills, laughing like there’s no tomorrow.
But like Martin Luther King during the late ‘60s, I’ve decided to stick around for the long haul.
And I know how deeply you ladies love.
I don’t doubt for a minute that a Black woman could love a poor man enough to leave her rich husband for him.
The way Black women love Black men has kept us all in one piece, if not in one place.
But I know for a fact that the minute Shanita told Towanda that she was leaving LeBron for Tyronne, “Wanda would read ‘Nita an act so Shakespearean that only a n-word could have written it.”
Black women, your friends are horrible! And I hate them for you! They give you bad advice and you should know it by now! They want you to be as miserable as they are.
And you’re accommodating.
I had a girlfriend in college that had our whole lives planned out together—when our marriage would happen, where we’d live, what our kids would be named; everything.
One day, I was listening to Curtis Mayfield’s Give Me Your Love (Love Song) and I got inspired by a line in the song so I asked my girl, “Could you live with me and solitude and need no one else?”
She said, “I’ll always need my friends."
To this day, I now wonder what she’s up to.

8 Stages Of Moving on After An Breakup

Stage 1- Time heals everything: It’s normal to have low self-esteem when someone you love leaves you. But remember, you’re still the same person that she once fell in love with. The only difference is that you are no longer together. Believe me, you’ll find someone else in time. As for your broken heart, the old saying time heals everything cannot be more true.
Stage 2- You are vulnerable: Anyone can take advantage of you when you are feeling vulnerable. You must therefore be extra careful not to look to quick fixes, such as dating old flings.</font>
Stage 3- Feelings of denial: At this stage, you will probably call your ex many times to question whether the relationship is truly over, or whether there is still a chance that your relationship can be salvaged. 
Stage 4- Feelings of bitterness: Remember, the relationship is over, so don’t express feelings of sadness and bitterness to your ex . If you do, you’ll be letting her know that you are unable to handle her decision, which makes you look immature. Instead, channel those feelings into positive energy by improving the skills at the activities you love.
Stage 5- Take time off: A lot of men try to rebuild their new broken fragile ego, by dating again too soon after a breakup. Stop! You’ll only end up damaging yourself even more, as well as the person you are dating. If you date someone just to fill a gap, that’s the way you’ll end up treating that person. Stay away from women who’ll prey on your fragile emotional state, and take advantage of your vulnerability. This will only give you a false sense of trust. Take time off and get involved in things you never had the time to do before. Example; Strip Clubs  
Stage 6- Socialize: Meet a lot of new people. Use this time to improve relations with old friends, network, and make new friends. A well-balanced life will lessen the impact of a breakup, because you will still have the other aspects of your life intact, and improved.</font>
Stage 7- Fall in love: Eventually, as time passes, you will fall in love again. Make sure to let yourself fall in love, and take the time to really let your partner in your life. There is nothing better than a new flame to make you forget an old one (once you have had the time to heal, of course).</font>
Stage 8- Don’t set yourself up: Don’t get carried away with this new found flame, remember nothing lasts forever. Don’t make this person the sole focus of your life, because if it doesn’t workout, you’ll find yourself right back at Stage 1.

New Year, New Relationships

An new year approaches,people often begin to look for new relationships so that they will have someone to cuddle next to during the evenings when there is nothing else to do for the day. Both parties sometimes enjoy being in a relationship when its convince but at an sudden moment,  they find themselves breaking up with their so called "soul mate". This is not always planned, but it usually happens and no one even thinks about it.

You began to wonder whatever happened to the guy or girl whom you were spending all of your time with. However, as time goes on so will you, and eventually you will see that this same cycle of fuckery. The problem is not usually the fact that this is what a lot of single people do it is the problem that they do not realize their own behavior. Realizing their own behavior is what will keep them from constantly doing this for the next 40 years of their life and ending up alone.